Sunday, October 21, 2007

Redface is Not Acceptable

Deadspin brought up the question only to dance away from it, while King Kaufman addressed it correctly: Why was this considered acceptable by Jacobs field security and the major media outlets who distributed this image without comment? Why are racial caricatures of Native Americans continually being used as front images for high-profile, multi-million dollar sports organizations? It should probably be noted that the roster of their opponent that night, the Boston Red Sox, includes a rookie who will probably end up as the greatest Native-American baseball player of all time. It's very saddening to see such inconsistent sensitivity in this country (and I mean that un-ironically). Our own letter to Dan Snyder and Roger Goodell regarding the slurry-ass name of their Washington D.C. franchise went unanswered. It's well-past time for high-profile civil rights activists and politicians to force sports teams hands; when will these teams names reflect the social normalities of the public at large?

Monday, October 8, 2007

Even a Drunk Squirrel Finds a Beer Nut Now and Then

It was only one week ago that Saints coach Sean Payton, after symbolically burying the team's 2006 season, then showing the team a literal 'empty bandwagon', then exhuming that same 2006 season, symbolically scattered the ashes of the 2007 season off a Lake Pontchartrain pier. He soon got sidetracked, muttering that the 2007 Saints season died too soon, much like the careers of talented replacement quarterbacks in the 1980s... Drew Brees sensed this was some type of film reference and chimed in, "Hey, Coach, just remember to put the cover page on your TPS reports". Sean burned inside -- besides having the ability to MAKE field goals, the departed John Carney alone possesed the innate talent to correctly pick up on a Big Lebowski reference -- without showboating. He would have taken the team to Rock-N-Bowl for white russians to hammer the point home, but the last thing he needed was another foot injury to Scott Fujita.
Well, after one win over a glacial Seahawks team that appeared jet-lagged in their own time-zone, those same soggy, mercury laden ashes have been symbolically dried and snorted by Coach Payton as if they were Keith Richard's dad. The Sam Rothsteins of Las Vegas must have been snorting something else entirely -- the Saints are 9-point favorites in this season's first iteration of the Dirty South bowl against the Atlanta Falcons. We here at Bloggy Blog don't care how awesome the Saints looked playing an opponent who couldn't punt without fumbling or even recover fumbles within their own defensive secondary -- in a game between two 1 win teams the line shouldn't be more than 4.5.

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

Consumer Affairs

Besides the opportunity to write in first person plural, we started Bloggy Blog as a forum to talk about Consumer Issues that we have faced. We here at Bloggy Blog are big fans of the Consumerist and have started our own blog instead of emailing them with every little thing. Plus, we won't have to read about iPhone rebates as much.

If you aren't aware, Bloggy Blog is very fashionable in terms of clothes, and is a big fan of buying clearance sctüffenzie from normally expensive clothing outlets. You get the premium quality at 'new at midrange store' price.

Anyway, to get to the point, Kenneth Cole's customer service sucks. Bloggy Blog ordered a shirt, pants, and shoes from their online clearance section, and the shirt and shoes arrived ~1 week later. Then an email arrived said that the $30 pants Bloggy Blog had ordered were canceled since they were not actually in stock. We wanted some of the shipping charges refunded, as for instance, if another pair were ordered, the shipping would be $7. Charging for shipping and then canceling the order without refunding an appropriate portion of shipping fees is like stealing, right? Well, Mr. Cole has not seen it fit to return Bloggy Blog's emails, customer service forms, or even answer the phone. And so Mr. Cole, shame on YOU. Bloggy Blog is thinking about complaining to the BBB, as this has worked well in the past with other companies.

While this has been said before, the salespeople at expensive New York stores are silently judging you. Upon entering Mr. Cole's store near Union Square, Bloggy Blog was quickly examined from head to toe by guy that stands at the front. We're guessing from the state of our decrepit Vans, this was not a favorable judging. For the record, Bloggy Blog is not outraged or surprised that this business practice exists -- but is disappointed that it is executed in such a transparent and unsophisticated manner. After all, if this is the level of subtlety required for the position, why not just hire bouncers from Duvet?

This isn't the first time this has happened...


Hi, Reader:

You are unfortunately wasting your time reading drivel that never should have been Pollacked out there on the internetz in the first place. BloggyBlog strives to inhabit all of the cliches of modern blogdom -- alternating their meanings between ironically and genuinely. The first person plural tense will be used ironically, because we at Bloggy Blog think this is the best way to entertain you, the reader. Note that we will refer to you in the second person singular, implying that the multitudes of bloggers employed by Bloggy Blog are only read by one person. (Are we that one person? Probably.) We're unpopular like that. Have you picked up on our excessive self-depreciation yet? If you are thinking that using the first person plural tense is the only reason we are writing this blog, you are correct. Also, fake german will be used as much as possible, and 100% of Bloggy Blog will be reportedly written inside an independent cafe with free Wi-Fi.